Rodney's blog

If I had a dollar for every time I left something unfinished, There's a fine line between hyphenated words. Ivory hunters: tsk tsk. I've never questioned myself, so why should I start now? A man walks into a library. and asks for a book about disappointing jokes. The...

It takes a long time to explain what you don’t know. For maximum attention, nothing beats a good mistake. He works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap. Any simple problem can be made insoluble if enough meetings are held to discuss...

I get plenty of exercise - jumping to conclusions, pushing my luck, and dodging deadlines. Who says ‘nothing is impossible’. I've been doing nothing for years. I always arrive late to work, but I make up for it by leaving early. We never knew he was a drunk until he...

Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It’s already tomorrow in Australia. (Charles Schulz)

(This opening line begins with clearing the throat.) Sorry, I have a touch of pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis, but that’s neither floccinaucinihilipilification nor there.

1. If you see a bandwagon, it’s too late. (James Goldsmith)

2. Early to bed and early to rise probably indicates unskilled labor. (John Ciardi)

3. Why join the navy if you can be a pirate? (Steve Jobs)

4. The problem with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat. (Lilly Tomlin)

5. Get the right people on the bus and in the right seat. (Jim Collins)

6. The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary. (Vidal Sassoon)

It is impossible to communicate with absolute precision. There’s always room for nuance, misinterpretation and confusion. For instance, when identifying a colour, describing it so precisely that it could be identified exactly is rare.

There are more colours than most of us have names for. And more colours than there are names for, as the are an infinite number of gradations.

I was recently at a business event and asked a delegate wearing a pinkish outfit what colour it was. We workshopped salmon and coral, before agreeing that it was the colour of a salmon crashing into coral: blood orange.

If we can’t agree on colour, being evidence-based, how can we agree on issues, products, services and personalities?

How many of these colours (and blacks, greys and whites) can you identify with precision?

Monologuists, solo performers, raconteurs and other storytellers have much in common with keynote speakers. This monologue is formatted in a different way to a keynote, which is often simply word-processed. However, the arc of the story and its interactivity are similar in the theatre and at business events.

You can become an even better keynote speaker by going to solo performances and by reading play scripts for one-person shows.

Domain names can demonstrate that you are the category killer.

Take my comedian.com.au – please.

Amusing designations can also show lack of insight or a sense of mischief, depending on whether you give credit for unconscious hilarity.