We continue the episodic publication of The Management Contradictionary (Benjamin Marks, Rodney Marks, and Robert Spillane. Michelle Anderson Publishing: Melbourne).
It’s available in all good libraries, and quite a few bad ones, too. It’s in alphabetical order, so feel free to keep reading the blog posts until you get to z, or zzz.
The Management Contradictionary defines the real meaning behind management terms.
basic
An entry level standard that can be used as the benchmark for charging more for an acceptable model.
bear market
Environment in which shares are traded on the basis of share-traders not believing the bull received from companies.
behaviourism
In managerial psychology, the view that the mind studies mindless behaviour. The brainchild of a group of American psychologists whose disbelief in the human psyche led them to worship rats and pigeons.
behaviour
What you do before you’re caught at it.
behavioural science
(See misbehavioural science.)
behaviourism
In managerial psychology, the view that the mind studies mindless behavior. The brainchild of a group of American psychologists whose disbelief in the human psyche led them to worship dogs, rats and pigeons.
below-the-line
Paid and unpaid promotion over which you pretend to have control, such as PR, in-store offers and direct selling.
benchmarking
An arbitrary standard, without a bench or marking.
benefit
Something believed to be more valuable than the cost.
best practice
- The quality standard to refer to when you’ve been caught out merely benchmarking.
- The standard asserted when it’s not self-evident.
bias
Rolling towards my centre and away from yours.
big business
Allusion to the fallacy that all large corporations have aligned financial interests and shared views on public policy.
big picture
A larger frame to refer to if the data doesn’t support your vision.
bill
- Invoicing process, especially useful to expedite in advance, as in the accountants’ triple mantra:
- Bill early, pay late
- Buy low, sell high
- Cash is king.
- Gentle reminder by a supplier about money that they believe that you might owe them.
blue-collar
The uniform of the working class, worn so that they will not be inadvertently distracted from making and fixing stuff by being asked to fill in forms, such as tax invoices or receipts.
board of directors
Group of mainly men who went to the same private school last millennium, have shared values and world views, and can easily substitute for each other should golf or sailing or overseas holidays or divorce proceedings interfere with attendance at meetings.
body language
The discourse of dubious, doubtful descriptions posturing as science, and the body of attitudes gesturing towards meaningful symbols.
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Rodney Marks
I’m an Australian corporate comedian, performing comic hoaxes at business events. If you like these blogs, you’ll like my live comedy. If you don’t like these blogs, you still might like my live comedy.
I don’t do cheap jokes, and I’m freer than you think. I’m comical not anatomical, economical not astronomical. Add comedian.com.au to your bookmarks, and one day: book Marks.
I’m based in Sydney and travel widely. For more info – and to contact me directly – see my LinkedIn profile, and website: www.comedian.com.au.