Excuses for having a messy desk
- A clean desk means that your drawers and filing cabinets are full of junk.
- Looking at one piece of paper at a time is inefficient, and indicative of an inability to multi-task.
- If your desk is clean, co-workers may think that you’re about to change jobs. Anyway, I alone know where everything is. That’s called job security.
- A messy desk in and of itself is a useful excuse for many other parts of your role: files, invoices, telephone message, meeting minutes and your diary can all be lost as required, and simultaneously be within easy reach should a real need arise.
Excuses for changing jobs so often
- You have tried to broaden your experience base to bring to each new role a broad understanding of how the industry as a whole works.
- Your former boss accused you of sexual harassment, and wasn’t convinced by your feeble attempt to laugh it off: “For me, ‘harass’ is two words”.
- Your diligence showed up colleagues as lazy, and they white-anted you.
- You embrace change, and whilst terribly loyal, always look for opportunities to grow, both as a person and as a professional.
Excuses for not winning that sales pitch
- You weren’t prepared to spend the company’s money on a loss leader, and the opposition undercut you on price.
- They didn’t understand your ideas and they are so far ahead of their time.
- You thought that the submission deadline was just a rough indication.
- You chose the spaghetti bolognese at the pitch selection lunch, and it splattered all over the tender documentation.
Excuses for failing at any work task
- Colleagues let you down.
- The organisation didn’t resource you.
- The photocopy firm, or the courier, or the consultant, or the computer genius didn’t do what they promised they would.
- Whilst you are capable of carrying out most assignments, this was the one area in which you felt out of your depth.
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